When things don't work as planned.

If there was one thing I could write books about, it would be failure.

And according to Edison's efforts regarding the lightbulb, one should think that this is the way it's supposed to be. Fail a thousand times. Find thousand ways how not to do something. Eventually you will stumble over the solution which has always been there, you just couldn't see it because your eyes were focused on so many different things or you just weren't ready. There's a lot of truth in this and ultimately these episodes, maybe even whole character arcs, build not only our character but also shape our reality. Of course, this doesn't change the fact that every failure hurts a bit, especially when you know that you had the solution right in front of you, all the time. But we weren't ready, were we? Experience is everything so the time we invest in failing and finally learning is time well invested - but optimization is a common theme in today's world and the older we get the more we tend to think of optimized ways to do things, even if - most of the time - we'll end up using the processes we established over the years anyway.

Failing means looking the opponent straight in the eye, already having realized that today counts as a loss, but still working through it in order to be in a more experienced position the following day. It means accepting trading time for XP. And sometimes we do it again and again in order to finally learn from it. We get better at caring for ourselves, for others, learning crafts, doing sports, building relationships, studying and sometimes just existing.

Failure is often considered the opposite of success, a negative state to be avoided at all costs. It is seen as a reflection of weakness, a mark of incompetence, and a sign that we have fallen short of some standard. Yet, upon closer examination, failure reveals itself not as a mere setback but as an intrinsic part of the human condition - an essential element of our growth, our search for meaning, and our pursuit of wisdom. In the simplest terms, failure is a break in the continuity of our expectations. We set out to achieve something - an objective, a goal, a vision—and our efforts, for reasons internal or external, result in an outcome that contradicts our desires. This rupture between expectation and reality is the essence of failure. It is a confrontation with the limits of our control, a reminder of our vulnerability in the face of a world that is not entirely malleable to our will. But to focus solely on the frustration and disappointment that failure brings is to overlook its deeper significance. For in the very act of failing, we are provided with a profound opportunity for reflection and transformation. Failure, far from being a final destination, is a passage - a threshold through which we must move in order to evolve.

Consider the process of learning: we do not learn by always succeeding, but by encountering obstacles, making mistakes, and finding new ways to approach our challenges. Failure, in this context, becomes a teacher. It provides us with feedback about our limitations, but also hints at the areas in which we might grow. To fail is to reveal our ignorance, but it also opens the door to the possibility of knowledge. In a sense, failure is a mirror that reflects back not only our shortcomings but also our potential. It strips away the illusion of certainty and invulnerability, inviting us to reconsider what we value and how we engage with the world. In failure, we are often confronted with our own fragility and imperfection, but these are not traits to be ashamed of. They are the very qualities that make us human, that connect us to others and to the deeper currents of life.

Moreover, failure invites us to reconsider the very nature of success. If success is defined solely by the accomplishment of a goal, then it is a narrow and brittle concept, one that ignores the complexity and richness of the human experience. True success, perhaps, lies not in the avoidance of failure, but in how we respond to it. Do we allow ourselves to be defined by our failures, or do we use them as stepping stones, as catalysts for a deeper understanding of ourselves and the world? There is a paradox here: the more we fear failure, the more it controls us; the more we embrace it, the more we free ourselves. To embrace failure is not to resign ourselves to mediocrity, but to acknowledge the fullness of the human journey, which inevitably includes missteps, losses, and setbacks. In this embrace, failure becomes not a dead end, but a beginning—an opening to possibility, to resilience, and to transformation.

In the end, failure is not something to be feared or avoided, but something to be understood and embraced. It is the shadow that accompanies every act of striving, a reminder that in our attempts to shape the world, we are also being shaped by it. By accepting failure as part of our story, we can begin to see it not as a negation of our efforts, but as an integral part of our growth and our deeper engagement with life. And, that is to say, everyone is free to fail as many times as he or she needs to in order to find the the things they're searching for. That's the beauty of it. There's no one size fits all. It's custom made. And everyone who's coming from one fail after another may at a certain point realize that all they were doing was collecting XP in order to grow - and THAT ist never futile.